Journal 5

Again these are just my journals...some days are mere snap shots of what we experienced at that time and other days are a little more in depth...more personal.  Either way, very true feelings and emotions were behind each word written. Enjoy....

Sorry the paragraphs and spacing is off...For some reason this journal would not uncode? I had to go through and extract each word out of a jumbled mess of symbols, letters and numbers...Does that sentence even make sense? ha! Anyways it is the best I could do without actually losing it. so weird...

China October 18 

Tonight dinner actually seemed decent. Graham through up at the dinner table and all over me. Twice. He then went diarrhea 4 times one on me and the floor...Yup, I lost my appetite.  
Jeremy is in the hall chatting with 2 girl teachers and I am looking at pinterest, it makes me feel happy. It is dangerous. It makes me feel sad too.. It makes me feel like I am at home… It’s fun to dream. Last night I dreamt of homemade bread. I was in the kitchen, in my apron and bread was baking in our oven. It was heavenly. I have been craving bread so much here. The kind my mom used to make. I cant wait to eat an entire loaf myself when I get home. I also promise to make fresh bread 1 a week, ok, maybe 1 every 2 weeks when I get home. It’s the little things we take for granted. 

I have eaten almost all the candy we brought for the Chinese kids. Apart of me feels guilty, apart of me feels pregnant…  
I told Ashtyn I liked her voice today. She kept saying VeggieTales and Christmas (which sounds like Crip-Nas) and it sounded so cute. She looked at me so sweetly and said, “mommy that makes my heat happy.” Ah I love her.